Rejection: Our Secret Fear

This is one of the greatest weakness most people face. Rejection. It can cause us to lie in an instant without even thinking, manipulate to make us appear better than we are, and even become vengeful when we feel the heat of the emotional response to it. Sometimes it stems from our upbringing, our financial upbringing, our social status in high school, or lack therof.

This is also a huge detractor in being a great leader. We are so afraid of being rejected that we don’t lead, we appease.  A leader must know that he can’t please everyone all the time. If you want that, you need to be the ice cream man, not a leader! One of my favorite quotes about leadership comes from Douglas Macarthur. Douglas MacArthur was an American five-star general and Field Marshal of the Philippine Army and played a powerful role in WWII.

"A true leader has the confidence to stand alone, the courage to make tough decisions, and the compassion to listen to the needs of others. He does not set out to be a leader, but becomes one by the equality of his actions and the integrity of his intent."

Macarthur knew that in order to be a great leader that you must be willing to stand alone., to make tough decisions. That is tough for many people in leadership positions because our ego needs acceptance. We all crave it, but you must find acceptance in something else. I think Macarthur also knew this… he goes on to state that our compassion marks us along with our action and integrity of our intent.

People may not like our decisions, but if we believe in it to the point of listening without dismissal, and moving forward in action and integrity (putting our money where our mouth is) they will respect us. Like is fleeting, respect is solid

As I said, we can’t please everyone, and if we try, we will never lead a mixed group of people anywhere with significance. That means you will have to conquer the fear of rejection. This is a demon we all have hiding in our psyche. It will immobilize us and cripple us from ever achieving greatness. Once you drag it out into the light of your awareness, and begin to face it, you will find out that it really isn’t as scary as you think. You will gain a quiet still confidence that people will notice. It will increase your dreams. It will begin to set you free from doubts and limiting self belief.

If you want to know more on this subject and grow in this area, I have several resources I can connect you with to help you develop your leadership. Please reach out.

Be the change you wish to see,
Ken

P.S. I will be posting a series about this quote later. So stay tuned.